Hooray! Another Baby!

2.04.2012


So now you know why I've been a little MIA lately: I've been busy growing a tiny baby!  It's unreal how much energy something the size of a pea requires.  It finally hit me this week though, like a ton of bricks, I AM GOING TO HAVE A BABY!!!  We couldn't be more thrilled.  Round two of parenthood coming right up!

The rational part of my brain is asking why in the world I want to do this all over again:  The pregnancy aches and pains, the soreness after labor, breasts that feel like boulders, complete and utter exhaustion for weeks on end, cranky teething baby...  And then I smile because I know it is all completely worth it.  All I have to do is look at Jed and my heart brims over with love and joy.  This brand new tiny human being is going to multiply that love.  I can't wait to meet this baby, to welcome a unique personality into our home, to experience more laughter and more joy and double the sunshine.

I wouldn't trade being a mother for anything.  I feel like I've morphed into an entirely new kind of person since Jed's birth.  I've had to become less selfish, more able to multitask, and a myriad of other things.  But with each passing week, I feel these new traits becoming a more integral part of who I am.  There's room for improvement, but I like what I see.  I feel extremely blessed to have the opportunity to raise children of my own.  This body of mine is miraculous.

*****

Now who wants to hear about the wonderful (not) realities of the first trimester?  Please, read on!  I am ready to complain.

I've been much more sick during this pregnancy than I was with Jed.  Perhaps it's because I had just started an intense brand new job and didn't have time to think about being nauseous with Jed, but a part of me knows that that is not entirely true.  I know that many woman are much worse off than I am, but with that said, there were times during this pregnancy when I looked at Bron and told him I didn't know how many more times I could voluntarily do this.

It all started with a bout of depression.  I was exhausted and moody and honestly didn't want to be a mother anymore.  It was strange.  Thankfully, those feelings didn't last long.  Instead, they turned into typical pregnancy symptoms consisting of miserable nauseousness.  Having the flu for a couple of days is one thing, but feeling tired, puny, and nauseous (coupled with throwing up) for nearly three months straight is completely another.  Add a toddler and you've got a riot brewing.

More than once I found myself leaning over the toilet bowl with one hand holding back my hair and the other holding Jed back.  He wasn't scared, he was curious!  The last thing I wanted was for him to swirl his hand around in the toilet.  Gross.

Which reminds me of my first visit to the doctor's office.  Every pregnant woman knows that she must pee in a cup at every office visit.  This was no exception.  Armed with just a giant popsicle stick for a play toy, I took Jed into the bathroom with me.  Before I could turn around, Jed had dipped his stick into the toilet and licked it!  "Aaaah!" my brain freaked out.  Then I rationalized that this toilet was probably cleaned every day.  It couldn't be that bad, could it?  I determined Jed would survive.  Well, I did as was directed and proceeded to pull my pants back on when Jed dipped his stick into the toilet again... but this time there was pee!  He opened his mouth.  The stick was half way to it.  I yanked it out of his hand and threw it away just in the nick of time.  Whew.  "Next visit," I thought, "I am soo getting a babysitter."

Anyhow, days turned into weeks and weeks became months.  I became a little depressed and even a little frustrated with myself for feeling sick for so long!  "Suck it up," I'd tell myself.  "Get it done."  Well, the dishes and laundry got done and I sat on the floor to play cars with my little boy, but I just didn't feel any motivation to do anything extra.  I didn't make any New Year's resolutions.  I didn't clean or organize or tackle any projects.  I didn't even keep track of what was in the bank account.  I was a minimalist.  And it was killing me.  Poor Bron.  All I could do was keep giving him hugs and tell him how sorry I was.  He, of course, has been a good supportive husband.  Somehow, I think he understands just a little bit.

So I have survived the last few months on naps, soda, cereal, and anything meatless.  Poor Bron ate lots of  pancakes and waffles for dinner.  Now that I am entering the second trimester, however, the nausea is gradually letting up.  My body seems to know when it's noon and six, but with some prompt food, I am doing all right.  I feel more energetic.  I feel happier.  And the reality of this baby is becoming more real.

Like I said, I'm getting excited after all!  I can't wait for this baby to rock our world!!!

7 comments:

  1. I laughed through a lot of your post! Mainly just because I can totally relate with having a little toddler and being pregnant. A babysitter is a must for appointments. Also strapping them in the stroller and giving them fruit snacks the whole time helps. Hope things get easier for you! The 2nd trimester is usually so much better for most women.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Congrats!! ;) I'm so happy for you! And I'm so glad that your nausea has let up! Mine still comes in bits and peices, it's ridiculous! Hahahahaha Your son is adorable and hilarious!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Way to keep it real. ;) I'm glad you're starting to feel better. Maybe the extra sickness means you're having a girl?!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Yuck! I have gotten really depressed during each of my pregnancys too. I ate lots of pancakes and waffles with my last two pregnancys too! If you look back, the times when I blogged the least were when I was pregnant. If I ever ate cereal I'd be sure to throw it up. :( That was so gross about Jed with the toilet! Ewww!

    ReplyDelete
  5. I'm sorry you were so sick! I agree with Lindsey, maybe it means you're having a girl :) I didn't get a thing done when I was pregnant. I came home from work and ate Popsicles and told don I couldn't do the dishes "cause I'm pregnant." I still don't get anything done mostly cause I'm lazy ;) Send bron over here for a week he'll go back home and think you are the best wife ever! Haha. And Jed is one nasty little boy. He makes me laugh.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Congrats. I'm excited that you're expecting again. I can totally relate to almost everything you have written about.

    I like how you're so honest and open. I haven't written hardly anything about this pregnancy on my blog. I didn't even let the word out till much later. I'm not sure why. I wish I would have to have something to look back on.

    ReplyDelete
  7. See I just CANNOT imagine going through a pregnancy with other kids to take care of! But women all over do it so I'm sure that someHOW it's possible. You are such a great mamma, I sure look up to you!!

    ReplyDelete

I love hearing from you! Your little notes make my day.