1.22.2014

5 Reasons Our Marriage is a Happy One


Bron and I will be married seven years in May.  I know that it's not long in the grand scheme of things, but we've been married long enough to have experienced some ups and downs.  We've ventured into a lot of "firsts" together like graduate school, moving across the country, buying a home, and most importantly, becoming a family with the births of our two children.  We've built a life together!  Undoubtedly, all these life adventures have come with their fair share of emotions and stress and adaptation.  And we've both learned a lot... a lot, a lot. 

Right now, Bron and I are at a pinnacle place in our marriage.  In fact, Bron and I have bonded over the last year or so like never before.  I didn't know marriage could be so wonderful!  We're still learning about each other and changing.  I really can't explain my marriage in words.  It's a special, intimate, working hard for him, satisfying kind of love with my best friend--my life's eternal partner--and my soul knows it's just right.  I want to shout it from the rooftops: I love Bron!

I know life has quite a few more curve balls left to throw at us and we still have much to learn, but I want to write down a few reasons why our marriage is thriving right now--as a future reference for myself and perhaps to other women as well.


1.  Communication.  One of my favorite parts of each day is talking with Bron after the kids go to bed.  Sometimes we talk for hours and stay up waaay too late.  But I like it.  We talk about everything.  We talk about the funny things our kids do, but more importantly we talk about our hopes and dreams.  We make plans for the upcoming weeks and months.  We talk about politics and work and that crazy tv show we just watched.  We talk about the things our friends and family are doing.  There seems to be an abundance of things to talk about.  I hope we never stop communicating like this.

2.  Show Some Appreciation.  Men just want to be appreciated.  Bron works hard.  He works long hours at his job and then comes home to his second job taking care of his family.  Yes, he's a typical man and seemingly doesn't lift a finger when the kitchen looks like it's been bombed, but he does change dirty diapers, he does entertain the boys while I cook dinner, he does do many things that are worth noticing.  He's a genuinely good man and I am lucky to have him!  A simple, "thank you" goes a long way with Bron.  Also--and this is where I can do better--what man doesn't like a big glass of chocolate milk or a sandwich while he's working on his computer or watching a football game?  Those little actions say, "I love you" in a big way. 

3.  Date Nights/Quality Time Together.  Just because we're married doesn't mean we should stop pursuing one another.  Bron and I really enjoy our bi-monthly dates.  (Two dates a month seems to work well for us for now, both financially and time-wise.)  We get to do something fun--just the two of us--just like we used to do and will do after our children are grown.  We get to talk without interruption and eat a warm meal!  It is relaxing and rejuvenating.

4.  Let It Go.  Thumper nailed it when he said, "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all."  I've noticed that the longer Bron and I are married, the more blunt we are.  But that doesn't mean I should pick a fight.  If something is annoying me, I try to bite my tongue and not say something in the heat of the moment.  If it's a real issue, I can bring it up with my husband later.  (Usually that evening.) 

5.  Sex.  Do not underestimate the power of sex.  Admittedly, I have been that woman who was too tired for it on multiple occasions.  "I've had a toddler hanging on my legs all day, a baby sucking from my boobs, and now you want a piece of me too?  Just leave me alone."  Yup, I've totally been there.  Twice.  Fortunately, babies grow up quickly, the dust settles, and Bron and I are able to create a healthy bedroom routine again.  (Sorry, Dad!)  I know it's really hard to drop that "mommy" role and put on the "girlfriend" hat, but I've learned that it's sooo important!  Sex simply bonds a couple together.  It's fun!  And I love that it strengthens our marriage.

BONUS: We tell each other "I love you" like it's going out of style.  Hearing those three words multiple times a day feels comforting.


Here's to many more happy years with my partner in crime at my side!

*Feel free to add your two cents in the comments about what helps make a marriage happy.*

^^These photos are of our cousin Rylee and her fianc√© Jeremy.  They stayed a night at our house over the weekend along with our Aunt Denese.  We had so much fun with them!  Thanks for coming to visit!^^ 
See more photos from their engagement shoot on my photography blog

5 comments:

  1. Okay, first of all I am in LOVE with that engagement session. The couple look like models and your photography, of course, is always fantastic. Second of all, I love that you wrote these tips down and I am glad you "went there" by that I mean sex. I think a lot of couples (especially women) underestimate the importance of it in marriage. I hope you continue to be happy together through eternity!

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  2. We also cherish the time after the boys are in bed to just relax, sit and talk, do those 'other things' ;) and enjoy each other's company. We will be married 7 year in March!

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  3. I agree with all of the above! And Don and I need to work on all of it! Haha always a work in progress right?

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  4. I have found besides just date nights that it is fun to find a project or something you both enjoy that you can share together. When we drove to Washington for Christmas I checked out a book on tape. We enjoyed listening to it together and talking about it. Kyle and I also reupholstered a couch together and it was fun to collaborate on it. These engagement photos, by the way, are fantastic! You really do a great job.

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  5. My husband and I will be married eight years in June, but we've been together for about twelve. I think your marriage tips are right on the mark. Communication, date night, sex, appreciation are all so important. My husband and I have been through our ups and downs too--we've even seen several marriage counselors over the years, but the one bond that keeps us going is that we want to work on our imperfections and ultimately make our marriage work. At the end of the day, we're still each other's best friend, and we both LOVE our son and our little family immensely.

    I'm so glad you and Bron are now even closer than before. I can definitely feel the "love" in your posts! Best wishes to you both for another seven amazing years and more! (By the way, I love those engagement photos!)

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