Thoughts on Pregnancy

Thoughts on Pregnancy

• 4.06.2012

At nearly six months along, I feel as if I'm rockin' this pregnancy.  It is flying by so fast!  As rough as the first trimester was, this second trimester is a breeze.  I feel great!  I am happy and full of energy.  During Jed's nap time you can find me tackling projects left and right.  Believe it or not, I often forget I'm pregnant... until I bend over to pick something off the floor or try to put on my shoes.  My belly is growing and it's starting to get in the way.

It's official: my pre-pregnancy "skinny" clothes look absolutely ridiculous.  I have forbidden myself to wear them.  It's a long and hard farewell to that rack in the closet, but I know we'll meet again... maybe next Spring?  

I have all together given up looking like one of those cute model-like pregnant ladies: skinny all over with a cute ball sticking straight out front.  It's just not in the genetic cards for me.  (I gained 44lbs with Jed.  My goal is to gain around 35lbs with this pregnancy.  I'm not sure I'm going to make it though.)  My body seems to think that if my belly is round, the rest of me should be round too.  My thighs and butt and arms have all put on a copious amount of padding.  Even my boobs have decided to get in on the competition.  In other words, I blow up like a balloon.  Or a beached whale.  Take your pick.  I can only imagine the kind of water retention I'll be dealing with come July!  

I keep telling myself that pregnancy is temporary.  Pregnancy and everything that goes along with it is nothing to be ashamed of and so I try to wear it proudly.  Pregnancy is a miracle!  What matters most is that I grow as healthy a baby as possible.  I can get my body back.  No, I am determined: I WILL get my body back.  Not exactly like it was before.  Oh no, that's the price we women pay to be mothers.  But it's worth it.  And if I can once again feel great in a dress and heels (with a husband who can't wait to take me home!) then everything will be a-okay.  Oh my, this weight yo-yo-ing can be really hard on a woman, not just physically but mentally!  Or maybe I'm just vain.

Anyhow, about the baby!  Hands down, the best part of pregnancy is feeling the baby move.  Right now, our little man often does cartwheels and tiny karate kicks to let me know he is alive and well while I am watching a movie or just relaxing for a few minutes.  I love it.

I am getting excited to meet the newest member of our family.  A part of me is really looking forward to feeling that indescribable joy after labor and holding a new life for the very first time.  What will he look like?  What will his talents be?  I often find myself wondering how alike and how different this baby will be from his big brother.  I only hope they will become the best of friends.  I let my imagination run wild with thoughts of them playing together.  I am having so much fun putting together Jed's "big boy" room (that he will eventually share with his little brother) and the nursery!  Boys are a riot. 

I'm also looking forward to experiencing all the cute baby things again, as exhilarating and hopeless as those months will most likely be for me.  Poor Bron gets to put up with a crazy pregnant woman and then a crazy new mother!  (Yes, it adds a little stress to our relationship, but nothing we can't handle.)  We all know that I won't get anything done those first six months due to a flurry of sleepless nights and feeding schedules and all the attention that a tiny burrito requires, but the fat rolly poly thighs, first smiles and laughs, learning to sit up, to crawl, and more, well, those things make my heart melt.  I can't wait to see what kind of dynamics this particular baby boy will bring to our family.

I love this motherhood stuff.

{Photos courtesy of my talented cousin, Rachel.}