^^Christmas Eve. This sweet scene stole my heart for a minute.^^
I have never co-slept with any of my babies... until now. I've cautiously thrown the experts' safety warnings to the curb in exchange for my sanity. Sleep deprivation is REAL! And it is hard. I was an absolute mess for a few days, teetering between flat out bawling and irrational anger. I wasn't myself. So for the last week or so, Conrad has slept curled up on my chest or next to me all night long. We wake several times to nurse, but I'm finally feeling rested. I love hearing his soft sighs of contentment and feeling his small comforting weight. There is no better feeling than snuggling a sleeping baby... except my arm starts to hurt being in the same position for so long! A part of me knows that this is just a phase and I tell myself to just enjoy. But the other part worries that I'm creating bad habits. Motherhood is so perplexing. Third time around and I still have no idea what I'm doing. Just hoping for the best and loving with all I've got and then some.